Looking Back – Reflect, Never Regret

Posted by Cassandra     Category: Just Good Advice

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As the end of the year steals closer, it seems inevitable that we look back over the months and even our life, to take stock and make assessments. What goals did we reach? What obstacles did we overcome? Did we do enough, accomplish enough, improve enough over the last twelve months?

Looking back can be a valuable tool for us. We should reflect on our friendships, our relationships, our livelihoods and our finances. To move forward, it helps to measure the past. By asking ourselves if we were the best friend we could be, how we could have offered more and how we could have handled the difficult situations, we learn. Sometimes we say the wrong thing, forget an important occasion or handle a situation in a way that upsets a friend. That is alright, and if you have a healthy relationship, it is good even. If it is a true friendship, this person will know you didn't mean to make them cause them undue stress. They will also know that these “confrontations” do not have to be anything more than expressing your feelings to each other which will strengthen your relationship.

When we contemplate our past and consider where we were and where we are now, we should never measure ourselves by anyone's standards other than our own. The only way examining the past will be of any good to you is if you never compare yourself to another. Comparison is the center of all misery. It offers no value and undermines everything you are. You have special and unique talents and gifts. You are a unique piece of the jigsaw puzzle that we call life. You are needed to complete the puzzle. You are needed exactly as you are. You are moving at the perfect speed and you are in the perfect place. Why compare yourself when there is no comparison. Nobody is better at being you than you and you can never be better at being someone else than that person is.

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But it is in our nature to grow and expand. As much as we need stability and familiarity in our life to stay balanced, we also need variety and excitement. Different people need varying degrees of each, but we are all learning and changing every day, whether we know it or not and whether we like it or not.


So when you look back, measure what you wanted, what you got, how you changed, what you gained and what you lost. It does not matter how far you have come, if you reached your goal or if you stumbled on a better goal on your way to the first one. When we reflect, we are doing so to learn. Shining a light on our past only serves us if we become better people because of it, f we let it mold us into more caring, compassionate individuals and if we use what we have learned to add value to our universe.

There are many human emotions that simply do not serve us. Regret is one of them. We all have things we wish we had not done. So it is fair to say we regret those things. But there is a difference between thinking that maybe a particular decision wasn't the best choice you have ever made and letting regret cause negative emotions that will keep you from getting the most out of life. Once we have deemed something to have been a mistake, reflection will allow us to glean valuable lessons so we can modify our behavior and adapt so that we can grow. If we ever face a similar situation, that memory will surface as a reminder of an unwanted outcome. Looking at a situation or event from the outside to observe and learn has great worth. Letting that memory make you feel bad had no worth at all. There is no need to dwell on things that do not make us feel good.


happygirl 72Res smaller 150x150 Looking Back   Reflect, Never RegretOur thoughts determine how we feel. Pleasant thoughts make us happier. It raises our vibrational frequency and just feels better. Replaying thoughts of anger over something that was done to us makes us more upset, making us feel bad. It lowers our frequency and our mental and physical state of being. Every thought moves us closer or further away from our goals and our purpose in life. The more positive thoughts we have, the better our life will be. If we can look at our mistakes objectively and see them as having the great value they do, without letting the thought of them make us feel bad, we will move closer to our true nature of being in sync with the universe.

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2 comments on “Looking Back – Reflect, Never Regret

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